^{My emails are sporadic, so in case you forgot…}

It’s the last day before Valentine’s Day so you know what that means…
Millions of people around the US will be making last-minute plans for Valentine’s Day or Galentine’s Day.

Those who acknowledge the holiday will likely be “going above and beyond” to make the event a memorable one for their friends, children, parents, or significant others…

Or they’ll be focusing on the simple efforts of appreciation for a memorable holiday.

I fall into the latter: Team simplicity “helping my kids write out their old school cardboard valentines and giving them a balloon” because everything else is just too much… for me.

But as a recovering perfectionist, I wasn’t always that way…

Years ago, I recall making robot valentines for his class out of juice boxes to create a memorable experience for the kids.

It was fun. But it was equally exhausting creating this “memorable experience” for 15 little kids. The following year, I took it down a notch to handing out leftover trinkets from previous birthday parties we held. Once I saw other Valentine’s, the guilt flooded in because I was convinced I didn’t live up to expectations and it’s all my son would remember.

Feeling like I had to do extra goes back to my childhood and extends into adulthood. From putting the book reports in those plastic sheet covers to writing lengthy explanations when tasked to track reactions to different medications though neither was requested, I thought I was doing what was necessary.

However, self-reflection helped me realize I was doing what I could to make everything perfect so I could control the narrative and be memorable. Though I enjoyed doing the “extras” sometimes, I was going above and beyond at my expense. In most cases, it didn’t matter. In other cases, it led to overthinking and then delaying the start or completion of anything. There’s a reason why this newsletter is “sporadic at best.” (You should see the amount of newsletters in drafts…)

The Reality Check…

It’s time we all realized that going big in pursuit of perfection is pointless because perfection is an urban legend.

1. Even if I did the fancy Valentine’s Day bags there’s no guarantee my kids would remember it. I may not even remember it. You can throw someone birthday parties for all the milestone years. Instead, they’ll remember the one time you sent the wrong lunch and make sure YOU never forget it. As much as we’d like to make things perfect and memorable, there’s no telling what you or anyone else will remember. 

2. Going above and beyond doesn’t mean the outcome will be any different than if you had done what was expected. Your friend may not volunteer to take you to the airport even though you surprised her with a limo service to go to work. The doctor’s office may not be able to squeeze you in for a last-minute appointment even though you intentionally showed up early for the last three. And there’s a chance you won’t be praised for creating the best dessert board because you went over budget to include three types of chocolate.

   
   
   Undeniable Proof…

If February has taught us anything, it’s that even “not enough” can be good enough. It may even exceed expectations. A month that pales in comparison by days certainly doesn’t fall short regarding honorable moments and dates.
 
Within 29 days this year, February is known for Valentine’s Day, Black History Month, Lunar New Year, Black History Month, Carnival, Mardi Gras, President’s Day, Usher’s concert (AKA the Super Bowl), and Rare Disease Day. Meanwhile, August has 31 days and no nationally recognized holidays in the US. Yet some people still look forward to it because it’s a summer month.

There are times when your best is warranted and there are times when minimal effort is justified too. Trust yourself to figure it out. You know when you’ve been slacking and NEED to go all out versus when you’ve risen to every occasion and can finally do the bare minimum.

Come as you are, show up when it matters, and permit yourself to do things halfway. Your halfway is someone else’s remarkable.

These affirmations could be exactly what you need to get out of your head and instead get to work…

Money Tip

Go for the yearly subscription

Interesting links from around the web…

^{Some of these are affiliate links.}

Has anyone used this site for building habits? It’s a “free” app that remains free ONLY if you complete the check-ins and reach your goal.

The perfect planner does exist. First time I stuck to one longer than a month!

Read All Sides to see news from the left, right and center

I fell out of the routine for a while, but groceries got so expensive so I started using Ibotta again.

If you like me, you’ll enjoy Jineen. I connected with her through social media and even appeared on her podcast. Her book is now available for preorder.

This company was GREAT for printing a bunch of photos from my phone and compiling them into a little book.

If you ever want to put things into perspective and see your place in the universe

Who knew business charm school was a thing? Here’s an interesting article discussing it.

I sincerely hope these links and tips bring you to a better place mentally. If nothing else, please take this with you and repeat it daily as needed.

"Any space that allows me to show up as I am is a space I want to be in."

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